The Down-Slope

Seriously. 

I have to admit that I can't seem to shake this most recent bout of the crankies and I apologize to anyone who has had the misfortune to cross my path.

But I'm not kidding - the world would be better if everyone would listen to me. 

Here is a list of reasons why:

1) I only want what is best for you

2) I dislike unhappiness and gloom

3) I am generally very perceptive

4) I am well-read but also love pop-culture

5) I like celery and dinosaurs 

Oh, yeah and here is the most important one:

If you are good I will give you a piece of gum . . .